OK, so a day has past. I've had some time to think about it, pray about it, and even talk a little with HR (had to talk to them about another issue today, so why not bring this up?). Certainly the feelings beneath yesterday's posting will take time to see where we go. But I have resolved a few things.
First - I am convinced the comments came from people that I am not worried about. They are the typical complainers and, though I like these people, they must be upset because they disagree with decisions that have come to pass in the past. So they can through accusations my way. It's okay. The people I trust and respect the most, and who support me the most, I am convinced will never think this way. I can deal with some people with hurt egos and delusions.
Second - I will be true to myself. I can play the political games to a point. But there are some things that I don't think I will bend on. If that doesn't work well for me here at my current employer, that is okay. I have enough faith in myself to do things my way. It has worked so far. This isn't to say I can't take some feedback and mentoring to polish my game, but when I come to big obstacles I will play it like I see it and do not fear the consequences. I love my job - and there is no reason to sacrifice love for a job for money. So hopefully things will continue in my favor here. I have faith in Prudential and I will do all I can to continue to help them be successful. But in the end it's just a job. There are other things I can do. It may be uncomfortable; it may be hard.
Last - Unfortunately I will be more careful around Mormons at work. Not that I can be much more careful, but therefore it won't be too hard. The irony is that I feel much closer to people in the department who are not Mormon - and I will support them through thick and thin. We all will have people we favor - and I don't think there is anything wrong with that. It is natural. I am confident I do not confuse religious affiliation with respect of talent. But I certainly ain't gonna reach out to my BYU alumni and have them apply for jobs here. That is too bad, but something I can live with. I know someone who is a minority and they once told me that they never hired minorities - purely to avoid similar issues. It is a price some of us can pay. I don't think it wrong, but I do find it sad.
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Welcome to Corporate America
Today I had my first one-on-one with my new boss. I think it went well as I was given a lot of feedback: something I didn't receive much of prior to my new boss. But as I sat listening and taking note - and even agreeing with what he said - it brought some sadness to me as I realized that I have officially entered corporate America. And for the first time I will really have to think whether or not it is for me.
The first feedback was something that has come up before. It was mentioned once again by at least two people, it appears, on our company employee opinion survey this summer. Apparently there are a few people who believe I am discriminatory in the way I treat people; specifically based upon their religious affiliation; more specifically for being Mormon. There is a perception that I hire too many Mormons, promote Mormons, and favor, in general Mormons. Now I certainly know this is not a department-wide issue, but the fact that it continually comes up shows that there are some people that buy into this. And I can understand that people will have their opinions. The sad part is that I have tried so hard over the past few years to avoid Mormons, that it is ironic that it is an issue.
Fact: I have only hired one Mormon ever while at Prudential. He is no longer at Prudential (only stayed 6 months) and I even went to HR with a fellow manager when he was hired to avoid any "perceptions." This was two years ago
Fact: I have never promoted a Mormon.
So where does this perception come from you may ask? Well, we may never know because these comments in general come up in statements from surveys that prevent anyone from knowing who stated them. But, there may be circumstantial evidence. There are two Mormons on my team (though one will be leaving next week). Both were moved to my team as decisions by the management team - not me. I do carpool with a Mormon who was promoted by another Director last year in a very controversial decision. Many feel I made that decision or swayed the opinion of the other manager (who has since left the company). And now my sister-in-law works there. All of the Mormons, including my sister-in-law, are perceived, in general, as high performers by the management team (well, the Mormons I know of).
The odd thing is what some of the comments seem to insinuate. At least one comment apparently listed the Mormons I favor and happened to list two people on my team who aren't even Mormon. Try to take that perception away! Should I announce that in fact neither of them are LDS? Another, or perhaps the same, comment states that I socialize outside of work with these Mormons. The fact is I have gone out of my way NOT to associate with any of them outside of work, even though one of them is a great friend from my mission. The fact is that I have not had any of these Mormons over to my house ever (outside of team events), though I did recently go to the BYU vs UofA football game with my friend from my mission.
My boss did a great job of not accusing me, but just let me know that this perception is out there - and perception is reality to some people. His feedback is so that I can avoid this perception and hence not limit my opportunities for progression in the company. So how can you change/avoid this perception. He gave me the only feedback I think you can: avoid Mormons like the plague. Funny thing is that I have basically done this. So now should I go even more extreme? Should I stop carpooling with the guy I carpool with? I already stopped interviewing Mormons. I have someone on my team who is probably a good candidate for the next manager position we have, so should I vote against him just because he is Mormon? Should I sacrifice his career progression for mine? Should I make sure I do not work on any projects with others of my creed?
As continuing feedback he mentioned that he would suggest I take this one step further. That would mean don't even socialize with anybody that works below you as this will lead to "perceptions." So I shouldn't go out to a game with the guys on the team, nor should I go hiking with the people that like to hike every few weeks. I see the logic in this - and understand it. And the question that then comes to mind is: how much am I willing to sacrifice/change in order to be promoted? If I didn't care about being promoted I could continue on as I am; they certainly can't fire me for baseless perceptions. But I do want to progress in my career.
I think this is the point that many people reach and have to make that all important decision of how much they can endure the corporate politics game. I have a rebellious streak in me so I feel like "Hey, I'll do whatever the frack I want and if y'all aren't smart enough to promote me; your loss!" But at the same time I love what I do and feel I can make a difference at a higher level.
I will pray about this and see what evolves. Certainly regarding the Mormon thing I feel like there is not much I can do. I will have to try and distance myself even further. But can I distance myself from my whole team and not do things with them? I know that many think it is taboo to "hang out" with people beneath them. But I love my team - all of them. I like to be with all of them. Am I willing to give up that aspect just to make myself more "politically" attractive? I'm not sure.
How well can I play the game? How much do I really need to change to succeed in a corporate environment? I'm sure that depends on the company. So as I received some of my first "prepare yourself for the future" feedback, I find myself questioning my goals. Let's see what happens.
The first feedback was something that has come up before. It was mentioned once again by at least two people, it appears, on our company employee opinion survey this summer. Apparently there are a few people who believe I am discriminatory in the way I treat people; specifically based upon their religious affiliation; more specifically for being Mormon. There is a perception that I hire too many Mormons, promote Mormons, and favor, in general Mormons. Now I certainly know this is not a department-wide issue, but the fact that it continually comes up shows that there are some people that buy into this. And I can understand that people will have their opinions. The sad part is that I have tried so hard over the past few years to avoid Mormons, that it is ironic that it is an issue.
Fact: I have only hired one Mormon ever while at Prudential. He is no longer at Prudential (only stayed 6 months) and I even went to HR with a fellow manager when he was hired to avoid any "perceptions." This was two years ago
Fact: I have never promoted a Mormon.
So where does this perception come from you may ask? Well, we may never know because these comments in general come up in statements from surveys that prevent anyone from knowing who stated them. But, there may be circumstantial evidence. There are two Mormons on my team (though one will be leaving next week). Both were moved to my team as decisions by the management team - not me. I do carpool with a Mormon who was promoted by another Director last year in a very controversial decision. Many feel I made that decision or swayed the opinion of the other manager (who has since left the company). And now my sister-in-law works there. All of the Mormons, including my sister-in-law, are perceived, in general, as high performers by the management team (well, the Mormons I know of).
The odd thing is what some of the comments seem to insinuate. At least one comment apparently listed the Mormons I favor and happened to list two people on my team who aren't even Mormon. Try to take that perception away! Should I announce that in fact neither of them are LDS? Another, or perhaps the same, comment states that I socialize outside of work with these Mormons. The fact is I have gone out of my way NOT to associate with any of them outside of work, even though one of them is a great friend from my mission. The fact is that I have not had any of these Mormons over to my house ever (outside of team events), though I did recently go to the BYU vs UofA football game with my friend from my mission.
My boss did a great job of not accusing me, but just let me know that this perception is out there - and perception is reality to some people. His feedback is so that I can avoid this perception and hence not limit my opportunities for progression in the company. So how can you change/avoid this perception. He gave me the only feedback I think you can: avoid Mormons like the plague. Funny thing is that I have basically done this. So now should I go even more extreme? Should I stop carpooling with the guy I carpool with? I already stopped interviewing Mormons. I have someone on my team who is probably a good candidate for the next manager position we have, so should I vote against him just because he is Mormon? Should I sacrifice his career progression for mine? Should I make sure I do not work on any projects with others of my creed?
As continuing feedback he mentioned that he would suggest I take this one step further. That would mean don't even socialize with anybody that works below you as this will lead to "perceptions." So I shouldn't go out to a game with the guys on the team, nor should I go hiking with the people that like to hike every few weeks. I see the logic in this - and understand it. And the question that then comes to mind is: how much am I willing to sacrifice/change in order to be promoted? If I didn't care about being promoted I could continue on as I am; they certainly can't fire me for baseless perceptions. But I do want to progress in my career.
I think this is the point that many people reach and have to make that all important decision of how much they can endure the corporate politics game. I have a rebellious streak in me so I feel like "Hey, I'll do whatever the frack I want and if y'all aren't smart enough to promote me; your loss!" But at the same time I love what I do and feel I can make a difference at a higher level.
I will pray about this and see what evolves. Certainly regarding the Mormon thing I feel like there is not much I can do. I will have to try and distance myself even further. But can I distance myself from my whole team and not do things with them? I know that many think it is taboo to "hang out" with people beneath them. But I love my team - all of them. I like to be with all of them. Am I willing to give up that aspect just to make myself more "politically" attractive? I'm not sure.
How well can I play the game? How much do I really need to change to succeed in a corporate environment? I'm sure that depends on the company. So as I received some of my first "prepare yourself for the future" feedback, I find myself questioning my goals. Let's see what happens.
Sunday, September 24, 2006
spending money
It is interesting to me that most of us in the next few months will have a little extra spending money, once I start working. Tom is working. Bret and Tevia got to buy all those nice patio thigns and go toMexico. Jacob and Cari got a great dishwasher. If I work more than 6 times a month, I will have some spendign money. only Kathy will be poor and not working. :(
I don't think we have ever had this many people with jobs before. is it a sign of a bad economy? probably just the timing of our ages and where we are in life at this stage. I better say that I just mean jobs outside the home, because we all know that Tevia works the hardest of all of us right now. :)
I don't think we have ever had this many people with jobs before. is it a sign of a bad economy? probably just the timing of our ages and where we are in life at this stage. I better say that I just mean jobs outside the home, because we all know that Tevia works the hardest of all of us right now. :)
where oh where is Jacob Webb?
Hey, how come you never blog anymore? I miss your comments. and when are you going to announce the big news and date? how exciting for you!
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Early to Rise - Stick It - Work
Now that Tevia had the baby, I have little excuse not to get into shape. I guess that isn't correct, since I am in shape. I have little excuse not to lose a little weight. So what is the best way to lose weight? Well, in my mind it is to do something you love. I love basketball. It was two years ago I stopped playing basketball in the mornings and that was when my weight came on. Not too much, but enough to bother me. I mean, come on, the media forces us all to think we should be waifs, even men. I am a sucker too.
So this week I started playing basketball. Thing is, here in North Phoenix the church by me plays at 5:30 - 1/2 hour earlier than the guys in Scottsdale. That means for me to get there I have to wake up at 5:19. I played Monday and Friday mornings, in addition to Wednesday night in Scottsdale and then I played this morning at 5:30 AM at the local high school with some other guys. So 3 days this week I woke up at 5:19 AM. That is early. It has been fun though. I still don't have a six pack, but I figured it might take more than one week. Too bad. One thing for sure, it makes it a lot easier to fall asleep at night. But it makes it much harder to read scriptures in the morning.
Last night we watched the movie "Stick It." It is basically "Bring It On" but with gymanstics. I loved it. It was a fun movie and had a good moral. It also was a good commentary on the state of gymnastics today. I used to love and follow gymnastics a lot, but I haven't been interested in years. The sport is struggling and they need some changes. Is the movie worth the price of a ticket - probably not. But it is a great Netflix choice.
Work has been very interesting. For years I have thought our company (my division) has struggled with abulia, which often means the "inability to make decisions" (it is also a neurological disorder, but I like the other meaning better). When a business is unable to make decisions, this leads to little change. Change is good - and necessary, especially if you want to progress. With our new leader, decisions are now being made, quickly. That is good, but takes adjusting to when you are used to no decisions. This week I learned that they are going to take my compensation team (4 employees) and move them to another department. The rationale is to put them in a department whose expertise and core competency has to do with finance. Our department and my team is not focused on that, so we can hopefully gain some efficiencies by moving them. I am on board with this, but it will be hard as I love those guys and 3 of them have been here for years, including David Kennedy who actually served in my mission years ago. This will also free me up so I can take on more responsibilities. The one thing my new boss is good at is fairness. He needs his Directors to do more, but in order to do that understands he has to take other things off of us. And he has done this. In this example I lose 4 headcount and that responsibility and now will have additional headcount to do other things (one of which is to solve a problem he wants resolved before year-end which is coming to my plate next week).
But I am happy with all of this. I am finally being stretched again and being able to focus on certain things. Over the past few years I have been the guy who does everyting. That is good, but it also gets taxing. Jimmie appears to want to harness my talents for certain things in order to improve as a company. I believe I can, so it has been fun.
As I go through these changes, I have come to prove with myself a belief that many people have (including myself up to this point) which is: employees don't always need money or promotions to motivate them. The past year or so Tevia and I have discussed possibly making a change if a promotion or other things (like international travel) didn't happen. Now I am once again excited about things as I have been given a vision - some leadership - which I have craved. This makes work more exciting and I can think longer term. It has been fun.
So this week I started playing basketball. Thing is, here in North Phoenix the church by me plays at 5:30 - 1/2 hour earlier than the guys in Scottsdale. That means for me to get there I have to wake up at 5:19. I played Monday and Friday mornings, in addition to Wednesday night in Scottsdale and then I played this morning at 5:30 AM at the local high school with some other guys. So 3 days this week I woke up at 5:19 AM. That is early. It has been fun though. I still don't have a six pack, but I figured it might take more than one week. Too bad. One thing for sure, it makes it a lot easier to fall asleep at night. But it makes it much harder to read scriptures in the morning.
Last night we watched the movie "Stick It." It is basically "Bring It On" but with gymanstics. I loved it. It was a fun movie and had a good moral. It also was a good commentary on the state of gymnastics today. I used to love and follow gymnastics a lot, but I haven't been interested in years. The sport is struggling and they need some changes. Is the movie worth the price of a ticket - probably not. But it is a great Netflix choice.
Work has been very interesting. For years I have thought our company (my division) has struggled with abulia, which often means the "inability to make decisions" (it is also a neurological disorder, but I like the other meaning better). When a business is unable to make decisions, this leads to little change. Change is good - and necessary, especially if you want to progress. With our new leader, decisions are now being made, quickly. That is good, but takes adjusting to when you are used to no decisions. This week I learned that they are going to take my compensation team (4 employees) and move them to another department. The rationale is to put them in a department whose expertise and core competency has to do with finance. Our department and my team is not focused on that, so we can hopefully gain some efficiencies by moving them. I am on board with this, but it will be hard as I love those guys and 3 of them have been here for years, including David Kennedy who actually served in my mission years ago. This will also free me up so I can take on more responsibilities. The one thing my new boss is good at is fairness. He needs his Directors to do more, but in order to do that understands he has to take other things off of us. And he has done this. In this example I lose 4 headcount and that responsibility and now will have additional headcount to do other things (one of which is to solve a problem he wants resolved before year-end which is coming to my plate next week).
But I am happy with all of this. I am finally being stretched again and being able to focus on certain things. Over the past few years I have been the guy who does everyting. That is good, but it also gets taxing. Jimmie appears to want to harness my talents for certain things in order to improve as a company. I believe I can, so it has been fun.
As I go through these changes, I have come to prove with myself a belief that many people have (including myself up to this point) which is: employees don't always need money or promotions to motivate them. The past year or so Tevia and I have discussed possibly making a change if a promotion or other things (like international travel) didn't happen. Now I am once again excited about things as I have been given a vision - some leadership - which I have craved. This makes work more exciting and I can think longer term. It has been fun.
Friday, September 22, 2006
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
First Week of Enok
Okay, so it has been a week now that Enok has graced our lives. I have to say that I find it so amazing how you can fall in love so fast a fourth time. The capacity of the heart is amazing. I feel like we have been so blessed with this little guy. He is so sweet and funny already at a week old. I don't know if it is because this is my third, but I have really felt far less stressed than with the first two munchkins. This could be due to a number of factors. We haven't had to worry about going to the cardiologist since it seems his ticker is ticking fine. He eats like a little piggy and has packed on the pounds. He already has a double chin and his arms are rolly polly. His legs will catch up soon I am sure.
Feeding time has always been so stressful in the past, but this time, since he actually can suck, and does it quite well at that, has made feeding so much easier. He has super wet diapers and poos a whole lot, which is always a sign that the kid is actually getting food.
The only slight worry has been the jaundice, but that has been not so bad. His blood test yesterday came back lower still. We still have to do the blanket for two days and get retested on Wednesday, but I am sure it will come back fine. He is a trooper.
All in all the first week of Enok has been swell. I have only cried twice really. Once when I felt like I was starting to get mastitis and yesterday when I was just feeling overly tired. But I am a lucky girl and Bret came to the rescue and brought us all dinner. What a guy. :)
I love having a new baby in our family. It is such a joy and such a blessing to have him here at last. He was and is a most welcome blessing we have been waiting for!!! Welcome to family little Enok.
Feeding time has always been so stressful in the past, but this time, since he actually can suck, and does it quite well at that, has made feeding so much easier. He has super wet diapers and poos a whole lot, which is always a sign that the kid is actually getting food.
The only slight worry has been the jaundice, but that has been not so bad. His blood test yesterday came back lower still. We still have to do the blanket for two days and get retested on Wednesday, but I am sure it will come back fine. He is a trooper.
All in all the first week of Enok has been swell. I have only cried twice really. Once when I felt like I was starting to get mastitis and yesterday when I was just feeling overly tired. But I am a lucky girl and Bret came to the rescue and brought us all dinner. What a guy. :)
I love having a new baby in our family. It is such a joy and such a blessing to have him here at last. He was and is a most welcome blessing we have been waiting for!!! Welcome to family little Enok.
Sunday, September 17, 2006
The Runaround
Enok is doing well as he is about 5 days old now. He is in the other room sleeping on his "billi-blanket." In the first few days of his life, I have noticed some things about him. He is strong. This may be due to the fact that our other boys have had muscle issues (and perhaps Enok will as well), but he has the ability to lift his head and push with his legs, etc. It is amazing to me that something so young is already so strong. He likes to eat. He does something that neither of our other boys did - and that is craning his neck to look for something to eat. He is constantly craning his neck with his mouth wide open looking for a snack. He is expressive. Enok makes a lot of faces and already smiles quite a bit though he is so young. He has been fun to have in the house and we are glad that he is part of our family.
Yesterday we had to go to the Scottsdale hospital (about 30 minutes away) to get Enok tested for the billi-ruben (sp?). Tevia and I took Enok and left the other boys with grandma. Upon arrival I dropped them off and parked as far away as possible - though not by my choice - more so that parking there is awful and was limited in my choices. So I walked through the whole hospital over to the outpatient lab where Tevia and Enok were waiting. Upon arrival they Tevia informed me that I had to take the perscription to "Admitting" before they could do anything. So I gladly took the paper and headed back through the whole hospital to admitting. Once I got there we had to enter all of Enok's data into the computer, which took some time. Finally they asked for my insurance card and upon looking at it said that they don't take that insurance at this hospital (Aetna) for lab work unless the baby was born there (which it originally was planned to be). At this point I was getting a little frustrated and tried to explain that this is where our pediatrician told us to go, yada, yada, yada. He made some calls and in the end confirmed that Aetna would not be accepted but that we could pay $160 out of pocket if we would like. I did not like.
So I walked all the way down to where Tevia and Enok were patiently waiting only to inform them that we could not do the tests here (I guess more accurately I was not willing to pay for the tests here). We were told of a clinic/lab that would take Aetna just down the road, but it was closed. We then called the hospital where Enok was born and they said they could do it, but the lab was closed so we'd have to go to ER (which costs $100 now with insurance!). In the end we found a place 2 miles from our house that closed at noon so we had to speed all the way back to where we started from in the first place. In the end we got the test done and the results came back good (his levels had gone down).
All through this ordeal I could feel myself starting to get frustrated. I am guessing this is how others feel when they get so upset. But what I was so happy about was that each time that feeling came I could quickly say to myself, "why get upset? You can't change this and it is not the end of the world." Yes, it cost me some gas and time. But it worked out. I could have blamed Aetna (not nearly as good as United Health Care we have had the past 5 years) or Prudential for taking the United away as a choice. But in the end it was some time to spend with Tevia and Enok. Enok slept almost the entire time, so it sure didn't bother him. I am glad I don't get angy quickly. It is easy to see how many moments like this can come up and really ruin your mood for the day.
Yesterday we had to go to the Scottsdale hospital (about 30 minutes away) to get Enok tested for the billi-ruben (sp?). Tevia and I took Enok and left the other boys with grandma. Upon arrival I dropped them off and parked as far away as possible - though not by my choice - more so that parking there is awful and was limited in my choices. So I walked through the whole hospital over to the outpatient lab where Tevia and Enok were waiting. Upon arrival they Tevia informed me that I had to take the perscription to "Admitting" before they could do anything. So I gladly took the paper and headed back through the whole hospital to admitting. Once I got there we had to enter all of Enok's data into the computer, which took some time. Finally they asked for my insurance card and upon looking at it said that they don't take that insurance at this hospital (Aetna) for lab work unless the baby was born there (which it originally was planned to be). At this point I was getting a little frustrated and tried to explain that this is where our pediatrician told us to go, yada, yada, yada. He made some calls and in the end confirmed that Aetna would not be accepted but that we could pay $160 out of pocket if we would like. I did not like.
So I walked all the way down to where Tevia and Enok were patiently waiting only to inform them that we could not do the tests here (I guess more accurately I was not willing to pay for the tests here). We were told of a clinic/lab that would take Aetna just down the road, but it was closed. We then called the hospital where Enok was born and they said they could do it, but the lab was closed so we'd have to go to ER (which costs $100 now with insurance!). In the end we found a place 2 miles from our house that closed at noon so we had to speed all the way back to where we started from in the first place. In the end we got the test done and the results came back good (his levels had gone down).
All through this ordeal I could feel myself starting to get frustrated. I am guessing this is how others feel when they get so upset. But what I was so happy about was that each time that feeling came I could quickly say to myself, "why get upset? You can't change this and it is not the end of the world." Yes, it cost me some gas and time. But it worked out. I could have blamed Aetna (not nearly as good as United Health Care we have had the past 5 years) or Prudential for taking the United away as a choice. But in the end it was some time to spend with Tevia and Enok. Enok slept almost the entire time, so it sure didn't bother him. I am glad I don't get angy quickly. It is easy to see how many moments like this can come up and really ruin your mood for the day.
Friday, September 15, 2006
when what was lost is now found
It feels so good to find something that was missing! I found the Aquire tiles! I took everything out of Jacob and Tom's closet, and they were in that same little blue-green bag, way in the back. I had put Jacob's games up there, and he took most of them. He must not have seen the bag. there was also the old candy land game and pieces. fun!
so now, if we could only find Kathy's drivers license and my social security card!
so now, if we could only find Kathy's drivers license and my social security card!
Thursday, September 14, 2006
Mommy and Enok come home
It is almost lunchtime on Thursday and Tevia and Enok are now at home. They are both doing great, though Enok has a high "billi" count, so they will probably test him again tomorrow at the pediatrician's office. Malik had jaundice so this is nothing new. We'll see if he needs to get any treatments like Malik did.
It is great to have them home and I decided to stay home today to be with the family. Tevia's mother is still here which is a wonderful help. I just dropped Malik off at school and as I was leaving he hugged me and said, "stay and play dad, you're my best friend!" I am a lucky man.
Yesterday morning I dropped Jarek off at school and went and spent some time with Tevia and Enok at the hospital. I then went in to meet with a client and then went back to the hospital. After that I drove down to south Phoenix where our company is having a big conference this week and I was asked to work at a booth representing the international offices. It was nice to see some old friends and colleagues.
It is amazing to me how much joy a new born baby can bring to the world. Obviously it does to the parents - that's not surprising. But when I showed up at work so many people came by to offer congratulations, hugs, and love to my wife (many of whom haven't even met her). It makes it so easy to see that families are just inherently part of God's plan.
It is great to have them home and I decided to stay home today to be with the family. Tevia's mother is still here which is a wonderful help. I just dropped Malik off at school and as I was leaving he hugged me and said, "stay and play dad, you're my best friend!" I am a lucky man.
Yesterday morning I dropped Jarek off at school and went and spent some time with Tevia and Enok at the hospital. I then went in to meet with a client and then went back to the hospital. After that I drove down to south Phoenix where our company is having a big conference this week and I was asked to work at a booth representing the international offices. It was nice to see some old friends and colleagues.
It is amazing to me how much joy a new born baby can bring to the world. Obviously it does to the parents - that's not surprising. But when I showed up at work so many people came by to offer congratulations, hugs, and love to my wife (many of whom haven't even met her). It makes it so easy to see that families are just inherently part of God's plan.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Enok Andrew Wall
At 7:08 PM on Sept 12, 2006, the newest member to the Wall clan was born. He was quickly named Enok Andrew Wall by his mother as she sent "I told you so" glances to me as the child was 8 lbs. 12 oz. and just as big as she had predicted. He was also 20 1/4 inches long.
He looked healthy and had big lungs as he was a crier. Tevia did great during the labor and delivery. We originally were scheduled to go to the hospital at 7 AM to get induced, but were delayed a few hours. Around noon we were told we could come in. Around 2 they started the Pitocin and it wasn't until after 4 PM that her doctor finally arrived to break her water. The whole hospital seemed amazed she wasn't going to have an epidural - stating that only hispanics don't do that (duh, she's Mexican!).
Similar to Malik, getting to around 5 centimeters was pretty easy (or at least Tevia makes it look that way). At that point she took some Stadol (sp?) and, just like Malik, within an hour or so from that point she was ready to push. This point came quicker than expected so her doctor (Dr. Shannon) hadn't arrived yet. She had to hold in the pushing reflex a few times until her doctor arrived in shorts and then told her to push with all she had. It took three of these pushes to get the big Mr. Enok out and then it was over.
For me it seemed the easiest of the three. It didn't seem as long, as gross, nor as difficult - but most strange to me: I didn't cry. Oh, tears came to my eyes, but I didn't cry like with Malik. I'm not sure if this was because it isn't quite so amazing after two, or I just am more mature.
I'm home now as Tevia wanted to spend the night alone at the hospital. I'll get up early, take Jarek to school, go visit Tevia, then go to work to see a client that is in (Deloitte), then go back to see Tevia, then go to dinner with some clients... It'll be a busy day.
Welcome Enok the Ewok. We love you already. Many of you might know Malik's nickname is Beanie. I've already donned Enok with Eenie.
He looked healthy and had big lungs as he was a crier. Tevia did great during the labor and delivery. We originally were scheduled to go to the hospital at 7 AM to get induced, but were delayed a few hours. Around noon we were told we could come in. Around 2 they started the Pitocin and it wasn't until after 4 PM that her doctor finally arrived to break her water. The whole hospital seemed amazed she wasn't going to have an epidural - stating that only hispanics don't do that (duh, she's Mexican!).
Similar to Malik, getting to around 5 centimeters was pretty easy (or at least Tevia makes it look that way). At that point she took some Stadol (sp?) and, just like Malik, within an hour or so from that point she was ready to push. This point came quicker than expected so her doctor (Dr. Shannon) hadn't arrived yet. She had to hold in the pushing reflex a few times until her doctor arrived in shorts and then told her to push with all she had. It took three of these pushes to get the big Mr. Enok out and then it was over.
For me it seemed the easiest of the three. It didn't seem as long, as gross, nor as difficult - but most strange to me: I didn't cry. Oh, tears came to my eyes, but I didn't cry like with Malik. I'm not sure if this was because it isn't quite so amazing after two, or I just am more mature.
I'm home now as Tevia wanted to spend the night alone at the hospital. I'll get up early, take Jarek to school, go visit Tevia, then go to work to see a client that is in (Deloitte), then go back to see Tevia, then go to dinner with some clients... It'll be a busy day.
Welcome Enok the Ewok. We love you already. Many of you might know Malik's nickname is Beanie. I've already donned Enok with Eenie.
Knock Knock, who's there!!!
I'm sure either Bret or Tevs will want to write a bit about the new arrival... so I'll leave it to them, I just want to welcome the newest member to our family! Congrats, we're all very happy he's finally here!! :)
Friday, September 08, 2006
Sleeping In
So, we had a funny morning. Everyone in our house slept in. Not by choice though. I had reset Bret's alarm clock yesterday cuz I was super tired and needed a nap. I was very worried I would sleep past the time I had to pick the kids up from school so I set two alarms, just in case. Well of course I didn't think about it again and so this morning, no wake up call. For some reason I woke up suddenly and looked at the clock. It was 7:19 AM. Ahhhhh!!! Jarek is supposed to be at school by 7:30 and Bret leaves at that time too. I shot out of bed, dragged Jarek off of his bunk, dressed him, fed him breakfast, fixed his lunch, combed his hair and got out of the house in time to get him to school without being late. I think it is the fastest either of us has moved in a LONG time!!! Bret got ready in record time too. It was crazy.
I guess I wouldn't have slept in so late but I had my pillow over my head because I kept hearing Malik cough and it was driving me crazy so I had to block it out to get back to sleep after checking on him and taking a potty break at 4:45 this morning.
Anyhow, I just thought it was a funny interesting morning.
That's all folks.
I guess I wouldn't have slept in so late but I had my pillow over my head because I kept hearing Malik cough and it was driving me crazy so I had to block it out to get back to sleep after checking on him and taking a potty break at 4:45 this morning.
Anyhow, I just thought it was a funny interesting morning.
That's all folks.
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Christmas
Cari, it's funny that I woke up and decided I better blog about Christmas. Just to get some things out of my head onto paper. the more people we get in our little Wall family, the more presents people might think they have to get. I know Tevia wants to go no-gifts some years. Last year she certainly had some awesome ones to give out! I wanted to just say to all that no one in our family should feel obligated to buy anyone anything. some years are just better financially, some years we just can't think of what to buy. let's just say, if we want to and if we see something we know someone would love, then go ahead. for example: Bret and Tev have been buying gifts for Kathy for years, but she probably can't buy anyone anything this year. I just want to make sure no one is pressured. you may all think I am butting in, so whatever. take it as just an idea.
- next, Tevia and Bret, any ideas for the boys for a gift?
- next, kathy will be here, and we will be staying here, but it would be a special treat for a grandma to have the camera hooked up that day just to see the boys even for a few minutes that day....
I know that is a bad subject, but I still don't get why it would bother your computer so much when so many people use it.
-Christmas cards? If we take the family picture in November, I won't be able to use it for Christmas cards. I am trying do decide if I should just skip them this year, make up some kind of paper with photos on it, ( I don't know how, but I could learn), send them after the holidays, or just send out one of the 6 of us from Cedar Point. any creative ideas?
- next, Tevia and Bret, any ideas for the boys for a gift?
- next, kathy will be here, and we will be staying here, but it would be a special treat for a grandma to have the camera hooked up that day just to see the boys even for a few minutes that day....
I know that is a bad subject, but I still don't get why it would bother your computer so much when so many people use it.
-Christmas cards? If we take the family picture in November, I won't be able to use it for Christmas cards. I am trying do decide if I should just skip them this year, make up some kind of paper with photos on it, ( I don't know how, but I could learn), send them after the holidays, or just send out one of the 6 of us from Cedar Point. any creative ideas?
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Christmas and my parents
Well, here's the update: we (that's Jacob Wall, me, and Nicole) will be remaining in Provo this Christmas season. Through some conversations the last few days with my parents and the very influential decision of our two good friends to get married round about then (go Jared and Amanda!), we've decided this is the place for us to be. It will be really interesting to be spending Christmas in Utah, since I've never done that before. All my life, I've had somewhere else to be. I guess we really live here now or something. Yikes.
What has most fascinated me about this decision making process is my parents and the role they ended up not playing in all this. Most of my 23 years (and yes, it's now midnight, so I get to tack on the extra year, lol) my focus in life has been to make my parents pleased with me. That focus changed a lot when I met and then later married Jacob because, let's face it, he's a little bit more exciting in a lot of areas. But even when it came to planning the wedding, most of the decisions I made were to make them happy, and looking back, I do wish I would have done some things differently.
But when it came to this decision, I worried and a stewed and I kept Jacob up half the night Sunday night talking his ear off about what I would say and then what they would probably say, etc, etc, when I called to tell them that we had decided to not go there this year. Then I actually talked to them about our decision. And not only did my parents do a pretty good job of not arguing with me or trying to change my mind, I didn't try to talk myself out of my decision through the course of the conversation. I knew that staying here was the best decision we could make for our most immediate family (meaning the two of us) and that was that.
I'm aware that like many of my posts, I'm rambling and probably not making much sense. Sorry about that. But for me, this was a good thing to have happen right now. Knowing that I can love my parents but not place their happiness has the highest priority in the list is a good place to have arrived at. AND I'm really pround of Nicole for doing the same thing.
With the Knutti insanity behind us, I would like to brag about my husband. He bought me the most wonderful birthday present I could have imagined (except the Wii and 1. it's not out yet and 2. it's more of a hockey stick present really) and that would be a dishwasher. I'm a spoiled girl. No, really, it's true; ask Nicole. :-) Living this past year without a dishwasher hasn't been hard, but it's been annoying and I've whined more than once about doing the dishes by hand. And I'm sure we would have been just fine going on without a functional dishwasher. But now that we have one again (and a stinking nice one to boot), I am so grateful for technology and for Jacob for thinking of buying one, and for running water and for electricity, and all the things that make it possible that I can put our dirty dishes into this big box, press a button, go do something else, and a little while later, poof: clean dishes.
In summary, we're staying in Utah for Christmas, I got a dishwasher for my birthday and life is good. I mean, if Jacob's not yelling at the computer, that's gotta mean good things, right? :-P
What has most fascinated me about this decision making process is my parents and the role they ended up not playing in all this. Most of my 23 years (and yes, it's now midnight, so I get to tack on the extra year, lol) my focus in life has been to make my parents pleased with me. That focus changed a lot when I met and then later married Jacob because, let's face it, he's a little bit more exciting in a lot of areas. But even when it came to planning the wedding, most of the decisions I made were to make them happy, and looking back, I do wish I would have done some things differently.
But when it came to this decision, I worried and a stewed and I kept Jacob up half the night Sunday night talking his ear off about what I would say and then what they would probably say, etc, etc, when I called to tell them that we had decided to not go there this year. Then I actually talked to them about our decision. And not only did my parents do a pretty good job of not arguing with me or trying to change my mind, I didn't try to talk myself out of my decision through the course of the conversation. I knew that staying here was the best decision we could make for our most immediate family (meaning the two of us) and that was that.
I'm aware that like many of my posts, I'm rambling and probably not making much sense. Sorry about that. But for me, this was a good thing to have happen right now. Knowing that I can love my parents but not place their happiness has the highest priority in the list is a good place to have arrived at. AND I'm really pround of Nicole for doing the same thing.
With the Knutti insanity behind us, I would like to brag about my husband. He bought me the most wonderful birthday present I could have imagined (except the Wii and 1. it's not out yet and 2. it's more of a hockey stick present really) and that would be a dishwasher. I'm a spoiled girl. No, really, it's true; ask Nicole. :-) Living this past year without a dishwasher hasn't been hard, but it's been annoying and I've whined more than once about doing the dishes by hand. And I'm sure we would have been just fine going on without a functional dishwasher. But now that we have one again (and a stinking nice one to boot), I am so grateful for technology and for Jacob for thinking of buying one, and for running water and for electricity, and all the things that make it possible that I can put our dirty dishes into this big box, press a button, go do something else, and a little while later, poof: clean dishes.
In summary, we're staying in Utah for Christmas, I got a dishwasher for my birthday and life is good. I mean, if Jacob's not yelling at the computer, that's gotta mean good things, right? :-P
Monday, September 04, 2006
Labor Day
It is always nice to have a day off of work. Even though I love my job, it still seems like such a relief to have a day to stay home, relax, work in the yard, etc. Last night the boys wanted me to sleep in their room, so I slept on Malik's bed as the two boys slept on the mattress on the floor (we had put it there the other night as Jarek had a cold). It was fun, though not too comfortable. Early in the morning Jarek woke up and climbed up in bed with me - he was excited to see me. It was a great way to start the day.
Tevia went grocery shopping as the boys and I played. They keep wanting me to play their New Super Mario Bros. game on the DS so they can watch. Since DS is "personal" device, it is tough for them to watch. So they both sit next to me with their heads on mine as we stare at this 3 inch screen. It is funny. We also have the game Brain Age - so we can start competing with all of you out there. Tevia seems to be the best around here so far. Her brain age is 22. It is a lot of fun. I especially like seeing the pictures. It is fun to see what games we are best at. I am really good at the math problems (20, 100) but Tevia rocks at the 1-A-2-B game and some of the others.
We are going to cook some dogs tonight and we can sit and see the new bamboo I planted today. It is cool. For most people Fall is here; but here it is still Summer - though it has rained the past few days. It has been nice.
Saturday I went down to Tucson to see the BYU game against Arizona. It was their first sold out game since 2000 when they played Ohio State. It was a see of nearly 60,000 fans in red hoping to beat the "mormons." It was fun to be there, but it was also extremely frustrating. It was perhaps the worst reffed game I have ever seen and BYU should have killed UofA. Oh well, it was fun to see a BYU game; I hadn't since graduating.
Tevia went grocery shopping as the boys and I played. They keep wanting me to play their New Super Mario Bros. game on the DS so they can watch. Since DS is "personal" device, it is tough for them to watch. So they both sit next to me with their heads on mine as we stare at this 3 inch screen. It is funny. We also have the game Brain Age - so we can start competing with all of you out there. Tevia seems to be the best around here so far. Her brain age is 22. It is a lot of fun. I especially like seeing the pictures. It is fun to see what games we are best at. I am really good at the math problems (20, 100) but Tevia rocks at the 1-A-2-B game and some of the others.
We are going to cook some dogs tonight and we can sit and see the new bamboo I planted today. It is cool. For most people Fall is here; but here it is still Summer - though it has rained the past few days. It has been nice.
Saturday I went down to Tucson to see the BYU game against Arizona. It was their first sold out game since 2000 when they played Ohio State. It was a see of nearly 60,000 fans in red hoping to beat the "mormons." It was fun to be there, but it was also extremely frustrating. It was perhaps the worst reffed game I have ever seen and BYU should have killed UofA. Oh well, it was fun to see a BYU game; I hadn't since graduating.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
DeseretBook.com - The Enoch Letters
DeseretBook.com - Mormon Life
I found this on my RSS today. Maybe this is a sign that Enok is coming soon to our town?!
I found this on my RSS today. Maybe this is a sign that Enok is coming soon to our town?!
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